Monday, October 29, 2012

Sunday, October 28, 2012

love as mental illness

I am currently reading a book called,Love sick: love as mental illness.it centers around the idea that love (or love sickness) replicates psychological disorders and  even manifests in physical symptoms (i.e rapid pulse, excessive perspiration, dryness of the mouth). all of these topics confirm my suspicions. i have experienced symptoms of depression leading to suicidal ideation after feeling extreme desire for someone. i have also experienced symptoms of obsessive thought disorder. also, self delusion (he must like me, he said hi to me) which is a step away from hallucination. These revelations are extremely frightening. especially since i seem to have a propensity to form quick, intense passions (more than the average person). this serves to affirm the practicality of becoming a hermit. oh well. i don't know if i should try to fight these feelings or embrace them to the fullest.

afraid

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Monday, October 22, 2012

self

there are different selves. i take on a certain one for a certain situation. is this deceit? or can one integrate a multifaceted self and call it true? when i speak to someone i do not tell them my foot itches because i know they will not be interested, or it will be irrelevant to the conversation. i am not lying, i am simply filtering information according to situation.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

things

soul mates. i think they exist. well i hope they do, it's comforting. certain energies that follow your energy, through all its cycles. like magnets. or celestial bodies pulled together. not necessarily romantic either. actually maybe never. i feel it's more about mind harmony. well what do i know though? what does anyone know?

Saturday, October 6, 2012

could love spare some change
see me on the street
my hair all dewy with acid
and say, she is my everything
buteverything
changes
from time
to
time